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An Easy December

December happens to be a month that brings with it a gamut of emotions.

Well, to be honest, the month itself does not bring anything, but perhaps it
is better to say that all of the associations we have with December bring
about the challenges.

December is a time of holiday spirit and quite often I hear people sharing
that it is a time that they want to get through.

I hear that every day in practice and I wonder, just what exactly is it that
people have to get through...

So I started making a list of potential challenges and with those
challenges, I humbly will offer some solutions over the next few weeks.

Of course I do not claim to have all the answers and in fact, if I claimed
that I did then I would not be a health care practitioner and coach who
wants to evolve and grow. For I think I had a mentor once tell me that the
day I think I am ripe I will begin to rot!

So enclosed please find a few December thoughts

#1- The biggy- Family patterns- Let's face it. For many, family is a
challenge.
It is a fact that I do not always relish speaking about, but why beat around
the bush, when I can perhaps offer some assistance.

At times, our clients share with us that the second they enter into the home
that they grew up in, They find that they revert back to old habits and
behaviors.
Often times we associate these places with the past and for some; the past
is something that they want to leave behind.

In addition, many people have made tremendous growth, and at times, members
of their family still see them as that young kid with a scraped knee or ice
cream spilled all over their prom dress.

I remember a prominent physician telling me that his mother in law would
wait to get an opinion from a ---Real-----doctor regarding a health
challenge and this doctor had graduated tops in his class from Johns
Hopkins!

There is an old saying that says something to the sorts of you can not be a
prophet in your own home and at times people around you do not see you shine
and rather remember you when perhaps your light was a little dim. For some
reason a few family members have the need to remind of the time when your
Light was not as bright!

Of course these are just generalizations, but perhaps some of these concepts
speak to a pattern that you run into.

Here are a few helpful coaching hints:

#1- Call any family members in advance that tend to cause friction and tell
them straight out that you would like to be a better communicator with them
and have a stress free holiday season. Perhaps you may choose to put this in
writing, or even meet for tea.

#2- If you have a specific family member that is challenging just try giving
them love. I do not mean be overly doting, or phony, but just try to send
them warm love and not give any power to their negativity.

They may try to zap you, but the love you outpour will only neutralize their
charge. Now at times your bright light may actually rub someone the wrong
way but do not take it personally as it is only a mirror of their own
internal struggles.

#3- Avoid the situation entirely: If the family member or friend is just
flat out toxic- try to give yourself permission and not feel guilty if you
just choose not to go to their holiday party.

Now please note that this action may also result in the termination of the
relationship, but if it is so un-healthy of a relationship that you could
not honestly say that you are not going to make their party, then perhaps
this is a healthy move that you might want to consider.

#4- Underpromise- Let's say that a party starts at 12 noon. Perhaps arrive
at 3 pm and leave at 5pm and have a short but sweet visit. This way you
share some time, but do not drain yourself in the process.

#5- Avoid the water cooler- You know the saying- that many people gossip at
the water cooler at work- well this December, simply let others know that
you do not want to talk about others and you are making a 30 day commitment
to avoid gossip or small talk. Some family or friends may give you a weird
look and perhaps they may even gossip about your non-gossiping, but let them
go ahead and talk all they want. You have better things to do.

#6- Last but not least in regards to family- Invite Spirituality into the
picture- Perhaps you can suggest that one thing that everyone does for
another family member this holiday season is to write a positive paragraph
about another's positive attributes and share with them a wonderful
redeeming quality they have.

It may sound cheesy, but I remember going to a leadership seminar with
accomplished businessmen and guess what one thing every leader relished and
took home...a simple brown bag that was called the bag of compliments in
which only the good side was written down and shared about them.

I send these brief thoughts off to you with our warmest regards and I hope
that some of these strattegies can benefit you and help you to create an
easy and peaceful December.

Stay tuned for other December strategies regarding health and the immune
system coming soon.

Thank you for all your loving support and we send you our best thoughts of
appreciation.

Jason, Elissa and
Chanda Schrader the
Awesome Office Coordinator

Living Inline-
Experts in Balancing Body, Food and Mind

4221 East Chandler Blvd. Suite 114, in Ahwatukee
Phone# 480-704-2787 www.livinginline.com

Just 1 mile west of the I-10 freeway on the south side of the street
1 block west of the Ironwood Library
1 block east of the new Trader Joe's

Voted Best of Ahwatukee 5 years in a row- Thank You!

Posted on November 30, 2005