Ahwatukee Living’s Ask the Experts

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Get off your bike to fill the tires!

What an odd statement - get off your bike to fill the tires. Who would try to fill bicycle tires while they were still on the bicycle? Who would try to adjust the angle of the handlebars while pedaling wildly down a hill? Would anyone be so foolish as to attempt to oil the chain while the cycle was still in motion? Well, of course not, that would probably lead to an accident!

Likewise, would you attempt to clean out the carburetor of your car on your way to work? How about washing out your freezer while it is on and full of food? Re-wiring an electrical outlet while the electricity is still turned on? Fixing the toilet while water is still running to it? None of that makes any sense. We all have enough sense to stop using an electrical or mechanical device if it needs repair.

It is hard to repair something while it is still in use. To fix something broken, you have to get off of it, get out of it, empty it, turn it off, clear it out, take it apart, lay it down, break it down, look inside, all kinds of things must be done, but you simply can’t keep using it while it’s broken.

We seem to know this about mechanical and electrical devices, except when it comes to a couple very important electrochemical systems – our hearts and our minds!

When we get a ‘broken heart,’ we have to ‘get off of it’ to get it to heal. We have to ‘stop using it.’ We have to ‘clear it out,’ ‘lay it down,’ ‘take it apart,’ and ‘look inside of it in order to fix it. We simply can’t keep using it while it’s broken. What that specifically means is that when you suffer a broken heart, like when you lose a loved one or when someone breaks up with you or divorces you, you have to allow yourself to just sort of close up for a little while, to rest your heart. You don’t need to be dating or trying to make anyone else feel good. Just relax and allow yourself some time to get over it. You also have to really examine the situation, to find out why your heart got broken in the first place. If you rush right into a new relationship before you figure out what went wrong with the first one, you’re bound to make another really bad choice.

Additionally, when your mind is ‘broken,’ when you are exhausted, confused, overwhelmed, and frazzled, you have to give yourself a break. You have to ‘get off of’ your brain and let it get some rest. You need sleep, proper nutrition, enough water, and restful, relaxing ideas before you can ‘get back on’ your brain and start working it again. Let yourself have some time where you don’t use it for a little while. If you’re constantly using something and never doing any maintenance on it, you’re gonna wear it out.

So, you would never try to change a flat on your car while you were rolling through the McDonald’s drive-through, so quit trying to use a broken heart or a frazzled mind. Give yourself the proper time, tools, and help to heal, when it is needed!

Posted on May 17, 2005